Reading

Ever read with your partner for fun?  
Sound boring?  
Try it.


Make something warm to drink - a little tea or cocoa, maybe.  Pack the sofa with pillows and blankets.  Get comfy.    


She asked him to choose from a selection of three books of short stories by authors they both like. He chose Neil Gaiman's "Fragile Things".  

We cuddled up on the sofa and took turns reading a few pages at a time.  Sharing a story from a book is much more intimate than watching a movie together.  Your attention is exchanged with each other rather than the screen.  


Our advice is to cover about 25 pages total.  Reading anything longer than that on a Friday night after a long work week is too much.   You're going to get tongue tied and someone's going to fall asleep. (him)  You could choose a short story, an article, poetry, or even a novel to read together over several weeks.  She thinks a comic book might be funny to try together.  Just make sure it's something you're both interested in flipping through.       


This was a successful Date Night.  It worked within our rules and budget and definitely brought us closer together for the evening. We plan to start reading together on a regular basis.  
     

Brauts, Brats and Bad Ideas

Not the best Date Night.  He bought brauts and really good mustard.  Nice start.  Five minutes into dinner an argument with the kids bled into an argument with each other.


She had planned to explore a list of 43 different kisses she found on a fun blog.  After the argument the only thing she felt like asking him to kiss was, well, not her lips.  She said she wasn't sure if she wanted to do Date Night because she "wasn't really feeling it."  She went out to clear her head and ended up at the craft store.  She bought a couple of T-shirts for the toddler who just outgrew everything he owned and some fabric crayons.  Shirts $2.50.  Fabric Crayons: 2/$3.50


When she returned home she informed him that if he wanted to do Date Night they could design T-shirts for the baby.  He agreed with little enthusiasm.  Date Night is not supposed to be about the kids.  He thought they could do something like this any night of the week.


It would be nice to report that once they put the music on and got into it, they had a great time.  They laughed and reconnected.  They were able to enjoy being creative together even though the activity was outside the Date Night guidelines.  That's not how it went down.  They designed their T's, talked about what color crayons to use and worked independently at the same table.


The shirts came out pretty cool.  This might be a fun activity for the whole family to do together, but it did not work for Date Night.


There are probably some good lessons to be learned here about things like:
  *Not making Date Night about the kids
  *Trying to be enthusiastic about your partner's idea, even if it's not something you like
  *Not allowing petty fights to sour the mood


Maybe in a few days we'll start reflecting on these lessons.  Right now we're busy being cross.


Better luck next week.

Teamwork

The dinner was a bit more elaborate than usual. He was going to get an "Italian" meal just to be funny but then saw a fondue box and was sold. Yeah, it was close to $12 but he saved some money buying day-old bread. And cheese is good. He also got a small bowl of olive oil and added a bit of pepper, salt, some generic seasoning, and a pinch of garlic powder. Romantic dinner for two, less than $15.


Errands she had to run gave dinner a very late start but he used the time to clean the TV area. Wait, TV? Yes, but he can explain. The kids were still up and fondue is a meal that you need to sit for. So we turned on something for the baby while we ate gobs of cheesy bread and talked about the week, plans for the weekend and plans for Date Night. Don't give us crap about using the TV as a baby-sitter, it's Date Night and whatever keeps the little savages out of our way is a valid option.


So after the monsters were finally in bed and asleep, we got going on Date Night. It was nearly 10:30. Late, yes, but we are committed. So we were off. This week, he decided on juggling. Yeah, it sounds like a cop-out given the Mid-Week check in but he really wants to do this. He's actually tried to do this before.


The thing about juggling is anyone can do it. And any two people can juggle together. Not just in the same room, but with four hands and three balls. Sounds like some manager's team-building schtick, right? Well it's true and it works. After about an hour and a half of picking up balls, laughing, picking up balls, teasing, and picking up balls we got it for a few tosses. We wont be winning any prizes for our juggling talent, but we had a hell of a lot of fun.

Henna Tattoos

Cruising a thrift store, you can find all sorts of stuff. She was looking for books for the kids when she came across a Henna Tattoo kit for $1.91. Being just within our budget, she picked it up. So after dinner, the older kids, in an act that can be described as "kind" or better described as "suspicious" agreed to watch the baby while she cleaned up the dishes and he cleaned up the area in the basement around the couch. Both not small tasks.

Having a nice, clean place for Date Night is important. Get the half eaten pb&j sandwiches out of there. Pick all of the Tank Engine toys, Hot Wheels cars and all of your unpaid bills up off of the coffee table. Vacuum, dust and de-funk. Get all of the stuff that makes the other days of the week so stressful put away. Light some candles and incense. This night is special, so go for it. For a few hours, it's just us.


We made a playlist of songs on the computer during the week so that was ready to go. Just a few minutes a day, while checking email even, think of songs and add them to a playlist. Then you'll have the songs you both like on hand. Add to it and in a few days you'll have one thing taken care of.


As he was putting the baby to bed, she set up the henna area. And Date Night was off. I can't say the henna was the best work we've ever seen and there were some minor glitches, like when she cut the hole too small and the henna bag burst in her hands. Or when we figured out that the henna was way too watery after he got his tattoo done (it looked like a turtle shit on the back of his hand) but damn, we had fun. We laughed together more last night than we have in a very long time.



So for an idea for Date Night, check out your local thrift store. For a few bucks, maybe you'll luck out and find something worth doing. Or not worth doing but doing together.